#1 said to #2
“you take my orders, that’s what you’ll do”
#2 said to #3
“#1 will be the death of me”
#4 said to #2
“it’s time there was a palace coup”
#3 said to #1
“i think it’s best you fetch your gun”
#4 said to #5
“good god! you’re being boiled alive!”
#3 said to #4
“forget everything you thought you just saw”
#4 said to #6
“i’m disgusted by these politics”
#3 said to #7
“let’s send #4 to heaven”
tweedle dum said to tweedle dee
“it doesn’t pay to anger me”
said tweedle dee to edgar poe
“why he hates me i do not know”
said edgar poe to charles darwin
“ignorance is the vilest sin”
said darwin back to edgar poe
“the more you eat, the less you know”
quoth berry, chuck to holly, buddy
“the good mans road is rough and muddy”
concurred holly, buddy with berry, chuck
“the good man, too, will know no luck”
asked berry, chuck, of elvis p
“why did you shoot out your tv?”
said elvis p to johnny b goode
“that act was grievously misunderstood”
#3 said on the fox news
that buddy holly stood accused
of treasonous conspiracy
with charles darwin and elvis p.
his witness were #7
and #9 and #11.
#4 said to #6
“i’m certain now the deal is fixed”
#1 summoned the duke of earl
and said “our time has come to rule the world.
call #3 and tweedle dum
and raise an army for the war to come.
here’s a death warrant for charles darwin
and that white man wearing a black man’s skin
and a wiretap for chuck berry
and plausible deniability.
the duke, he called up #3
said “here’s where we write history”
#3 called the st louis flash
said “give me a big enough lie and a handful of ash.
get #2 to light the fuse,
rattle the cage and poke the jews.
get you tickets for the holy war
and the funeral of #4.”
#2 called #1
saying “god forgive what i have done”
#1 said to #2
“i worship a different god to you”
#2 begged #3
“when i die, who will my judge be?”
#3 washed his lilywhite hands
and said “you will be judged in blood and sand”
#1 called number #6
said “it’s hard to kick against the pricks.
have #3 bury #2
do it live, right on fox news.
i’ll show you how the strong survive…
while the witless have elected #5.
when dust is settled and day is done
we all just work for #1.
This piece originally appeared on my MySpace Blog, Full Mental Jacket, in May 2010 – where it is fair to say the response wasn’t always friendly and the range of interpretations were diverse and imaginative. if it helps, think of it as the crankier cousin to this. Whatever – this was one of the pieces I had a hard time leaving out when I brought the blog across from MySpace in February 2012 but, on reconsideration, I think it is important to show that sometimes the purpose of writing something is as important as the product of writing something.